


The Dead Sea

by ariane123



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: F/M, Yousana
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-17 08:09:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11847468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariane123/pseuds/ariane123
Summary: Two moments Yousef realized Sana was the love of his lifeorThe words of endearment in Farsi are beautiful and whenever I hear them now I think of Yousana





	The Dead Sea

**Author's Note:**

> The title comes from the song Dead Sea by the Lumineers, the lyrics are: You told me I was like the Dead Sea  
> You'll never sink when you are with me

Nafassam

The word “nafassam” in Farsi means “my love,” but literally translates to “my breath.” You cannot live without your breath, your air, and thus Yousef cannot live without Sana. Yousef first realized Sana was his nafass or his breath, when she took it for the first time. It was the summer after Yousef’s second year of high school when he realized that he did not just have a little crush on his best friend’s sister - it was more than just thinking she was beautiful and amazing - but rather he was completed engulfed in her and was falling in love. He realized quickly that he would do anything to make her laugh, or even just smile, because her tough exterior was often unbreakable, especially during the past school year. 

That year, which Yousef would later learn, was hard for Sana and brought along a wave of bullying and anger. Because of this, much of his time at the Bakkoush’s was spent making a complete fool of himself to see her strong frown and sad eyes turn into even a glimmer of a smile, which included him “accidentally” spilling water on his shirt or doing a flamboyant dance move - that always ended up on the boys’ snapchat stories - in order to hear her laugh; but truthfully Yousef didn’t care about the embarrassment because it always ended in seeing Sana smile or laugh in a time when it was a rarity. Yousef realized that he would do anything to make Sana happy and when she was involved, everything would instantly become better, clearer, and more fun. Yousef’s love for Sana was often masked by his position as the best friend’s older brother so it did not occur to most people - excluding Mikael, Mutta, and Adam - that Yousef’s urge to talk to Sana, ask about her day, and constantly invite her to hang out with the boys were more than just friendly remarks. 

So when the school year was finally over Sana began to smile and laugh more, which Yousef took as just her happiness with being on summer break and done with homework. It was one of the first days of summer break when the boys were over at Elias’ house when Yousef began to notice his feelings for Sana were more than a crush because not only was Sana smiling, but she looked radiant. Yousef, Mikael, Adam, and Mutta were sitting outside trying to think of something fun to do while Elias was getting water, when he walked out with Sana, who was holding a basketball. “I convinced her!” exclaimed Elias, sporting a grin, while Mikael added, “Thank god you guys were getting boring.” The rest of the boys started badgering eachother about how it had only been a couple day of summer break and they needed Sana to entertain them, but Yousef could only pay attention to Sana, who was wearing a fuschia hijab Jamilla had bought her paired with fuschia nail polish - as well as a huge smile for the first time in a while. Yousef’s mouth gaped open a bit and his heart beat practically stopped, his breath getting hitched in his throat but not totally lost. The only way to describe her presence in that moment, holding a bright orange basketball, was like a pink sun radiating throughout the backyard, each of the boys just a small planet compared to her - and Yousef knew this. 

The moment Sana got the courage to look over to Yousef, he instantly regained his composure and gave her a small smile.“Ok time to pick teams. Obviously Sana and I are the captains.” Sana and Yousef were broken out of their little bubble with Elias’ announcement, Sana looking over to Elias and Yousef just nodding because that was the way it was. Whenever Sana would play basketball with them she had to be a captain, starting out from when they first begged her to play with them and she said she only would if she was a captain, and now it was a given. As well, the boys knew better than to have Sana and Elias on the same team because somehow it always turned into a Bakkoush vs. everyone else game. Sana started by picking Adam, then Elias picked Mutta. Sana picked Yousef, insisting that “Adam and Mikael cannot be on the same team because they always get distracted when they’re on the same team and I am here to win,” but in reality choosing Yousef because she wanted to be on the same team as him but not be too obvious in her first pick. 

They started playing, and while Yousef was trying to pay attention to the game, all he could do was watch Sana making shot after shot. Thus, before Yousef could even realize it, a pass from Adam was coming straight for him and hit him straight in the forehead. Mutta and Adam started laughing at their friend’s foolishness, while Mikael, Elias, and Sana ran over to Yousef to see if he was alright. Sana, who was holding back laughter and trying to retain her seriousness, noticed Yousef’s hand holding a growing bump on his forehead and said, “Ok Yousef go lie down on the couch, Mikael look up symptoms of a concussion, Elias go look for frozen peas in the freezer, and Mutta and Adam do anything but laugh.” 

And so 15 minutes later, Yousef was lying on the couch, Sana was sitting on the ground near his head, Elias and Adam were looking for frozen peas in the freezer, Mikael was reading symptoms of a concussion, and Mutta was trying to keep Yousef entertained. “So Sana, this really doesn’t seem like that big of a deal have you ever been hit in the head with a basketball,” asked Mutta still holding back laughter as he looked over to Yousef, lying down with one hand on his forehead and the other only inches away from Sana’s head, which was leaning against the couch. Sana looked up to Yousef, gave him a small smile, which he quickly reciprocated, and giggled “Nope, because I am actually a good player.” Mutta and Mikael lost it, and Elias and Adam, who had just returned from the kitchen with an ice pack, heard the joke too and started laughing as Elias added “Damn Yousef.” “Don’t get too cocky Elias you’ve been hit in the head with a basketball a couple times too and remember when you got a concussion playing soccer,” Sana said, looking up to Yousef again, noticing him laughing. Mutta said, “You know what Elias I don’t think you brought the right ice pack for Yousef.” With the attention back on Yousef’s head, Mutta, Elias, and Adam went back into the kitchen to look for more ice packs and Mikael continued listing the symptoms of a concussion. Yousef tapped Sana’s shoulder, and as she turned to him he raised his eyebrow, as if asking if he would be alright. In his head, he knew that if he could lie there forever just looking at Sana, as she gave him a shy smile, he would be alright. She nodded, looking around the room, and looked back to Yousef, whispering “Just let them do their thing,” and motioning towards Mikael and the kitchen. In that moment, as Yousef and Sana shared a knowing smile, Yousef realized that it was worth being hit in the head to be with Sana, and he would not want to get hurt without Sana there ever again. Because in this moment, Yousef knew that Sana was his breath: her fuchsia hijab, her big smile, her bright eyes, her intelligence and common sense even in moments of chaos like this one all culminated to the girl he was falling head over heels for, the girl that took his breath away. 

 

\----------------------------

 

Joonam  
The word “joonam” in Farsi means “my love”, but literally translates to “my being” or “my spirit/life.” Yousef first realized Sana was his joon or his spirit when he found the posibility to seek refuge in her in a time of need, when he needed her to be his rock. 

While Yousef loved his job at the preschool, he switched to working there part time in order to focus on university. However, because of his only part time job at the preschool and his young age, when budget cuts arrived Yousef was one of the first to be let go. Everyone knew that Yousef loved the kids and the kids loved Yousef, so not only was Yousef heartbroken over not being able to actually work at the school anymore, but he also didn’t know how to break the news to Sana because despite the sound reasoning behind the decision, he had lost the first real job he had ever had. Yousef knew, as it was basically a well known fact, that Sana was destined for great things and had the highest ambitions in medicine - and if anyone could reach them it would be her. 

But for himself, Yousef always had trouble trying to find a passion that could actually transform into a job: he has convinced himself that dancing would get him nowhere and so education and kids were his next love. At the end of the day, Yousef knew it made sense why he was laid off, and if anything it would give him more time to focus on his studies, but even the small possibility of disappointing Sana sent shivers down his spine. And though he knew how much Sana loved him, it felt plausible that she would meet his news with a sigh; even more, he didn’t want to disappoint her family that had already bent backwards to see his love despite his lack of religion - which seemed like a barrier in the relationship. 

With this information, Yousef found himself hiding from Sana for a couple days not being able to see her smile or her piles of notes and textbooks without thinking of how he didn’t want to weigh her down, until he ran into her at the Bakkoush’ home. Sana was sitting in the kitchen, all of her books laid out across the table with earplugs in, studying while Yousef and Mutta were over with Elias. Yousef walked into the kitchen without Sana even noticing and for a second he just stood there, forgetting for a moment about his work dilemma and focusing on her beauty and diligence. Yousef sat in the seat across from hers, and put his hand on top of hers, which was lying across one of the biology books. She jumped a little and looked up, a smile erupting across her face when she noticed who it was. “I am going to fail,” said Sana, sighing as she took out her earplugs and looked down at all of her notes. Yousef chuckled a little bit, still holding onto Sana’s hand and looking her in the eyes, “You got this if anyone can do it it’s you.” Sana blushed a little bit and looked down at her lap, even after a couple years of dating she was still often taken aback by Yousef’s blunt compliments. But at this point, Yousef could only feel disappointment as Sana was working as hard as she could, and he was getting laid off from his job. “So want to hang out tomorrow after my classes? Or are you working?” Yousef shrugged, “I don’t know” and got up, letting go of Sana’s hand abruptly as he headed over to the fridge to get water. Sana’s smile instantly was replaced by confusion, wanting to interpret Yousef’s reaction as just leaving her alone to study rather than annoyance. As Yousef got his glass of water he said in a serious tone, “I’m going to go before Elias gets mad at me.” Sana murmured back an okay, noting that Elias rarely actually gets mad at Yousef ditching him to be with Sana and their jokes about it are always sarcastic, but brushing it under the rug quickly. 

As Yousef turned around to look at Sana one last time before leaving, all he wanted to say to her was that she deserved the whole world, more than the whole world and what if he couldn't give that to her? What if he wasn't enough for her, what if the life he wanted to give her wasn't enough. He wanted to sit there and let out all of the tears that he had felt inside of him and tell her that she will become an incredible surgeon but what if who he is isn't enough for her? Yousef wanted to tell her that he wouldn't blame her for not wanting to be with him if he couldn't even keep a side job, but he didn't say anything. He knew he would have to, they didn't keep secrets in their relationship, but not yet. Why would she settle if she could have anyone? She added before he left “Let me know when you’re free!” Yousef gave her a small smile and mustered enough excitement to respond “Okay love you” and headed to Elias’ room. Once there, Yousef received another text from Sana asking if he was alright and at this Yousef thinks to himself: okay Acar it is now or never you need to tell her she won’t be mad. Thus, Yousef and Sana plan a date to play a little basketball after Sana’s classes and then get coffee. Yousef, who had his eyebrows furrowed as he texted Sana, realized Elias was intently looking at him “Dude what happened” and Mutta looked over Yousef’s shoulder “Are you texting Sana? I have literally never seen you text her and not smile.” Yousef shrugged, seeing both of his friends were worried. Elias, who was sitting on his bed, joined Mutta and Yousef on the floor and became serious all of a sudden “Yousef what’s wrong with you and Sana?” 

Yousef took a deep breath, “I kind of got fired from my job.” Elias smiled a little bit and Mutta started chuckling, “Glad to know Yousef perfect Acar has finally gotten fired like the rest of us.” Elias laughed and added, “Seriously it’s not a big deal what did Sana say?” Yousef looked down at his lap, fidgeting with his phone before looking up and being met with Mutt saying “You think Sana will be mad? Oh my god Yousef you think it would be impossible to mess up a relationship with how much you two love each other but no you would find a way.” Elias grinned and started pretending to get up, adding “You know what I’ll go tell her.” However, before Elias could get fully up Yousef started insisting “Fine fine fine I’m telling her tomorrow.” Elias and Mutta nodded before Elias said, "Seriously are you okay with losing your job? And Sana won't be mad I swear to god." Yousef nodded and explained why he lost the job and why he was dissapointed, but when he talked about Sana both Mutta and Elias realized that his fears were unrealistic and agreed he should just tell her. 

The next day, after playing a little bit of basketball Yousef and Sana sat down on a bench, hand in hand, sitting in silence for a little bit. Yousef looked to Sana, who was looking at the playground filled with little kids and he squeezed her hand, attracting her attention. Yousef started saying, “Hey listen Sana I got laid off from my job but before you say anything please know it is because there were budget cuts and I worked part time and I am young and inexperienced so it makes sense why I was let go. But it’s sad because I’ll miss the kids but Sana what if I can’t keep a job ever you’re going to be this amazing surgeon and I got fired from some kindergarten job. I just” he mumbles the rest, looking down at his lap, as Sana starts chuckling a little bit and replied “Yousef relax.” Sana takes her hand out of his and moves it to his chin, pushing it up to look at her. “First off I would never be disappointed in you I love you so much, I could give millions of examples but we would be here forever and second you know those kids love you, the only reason was because they didn’t have enough money. Did your supervisor say anything?” Yousef relaxes a little bit, “I mean she wrote me this really nice email about how I was a great teacher but there wasn’t enough money but she could have been just being nice…” Sana chuckled a little bit, her hand still resting on Yousef’s cheek and says “Please please don’t worry because when you’re sad I’m sad.” In that moment Yousef felt his heartbeat slow down to a normal speed and himself fully relax because without Sana, he wouldn’t know what to do.

**Author's Note:**

> So my family speaks Farsi and always uses these words and I thought if Yousef and Sana spoke Farsi how much he would say them to her !! Hope you liked it!


End file.
